SO DAMN HAPPY!!!!

FOR ONCE I'M CONTENT AND TRULY HAPPY WITH SOME ONE. WE HAVE THIS VERY HONEST RELATIONSHIP. WE'RE BESTFRIENDS AND SOULMATES. I NEVER GAVE UP ON LOVE. IT CAME TO MY DOOR WHEN I WASN'T LOOKING FOR IT. I WAS WILLING TO LET IT RIGHT IN. I HAVE NO REGRETS AND IT WILL WORK OUT SO THERE IS NO ROOM FOR REGRETS.

JUST AS SOON AS I'M READY TO LOSE HOPE
I MEET THIS FINE, SINCERE MAN WHO IS DOPE.

IT'S LIKE HE SAYS ALL THE RIGHT WORDS
THE MOST SINCEREST, AND BELIEVABLE WORDS I EVER HEARD.

OUT OF ALL THE MALES THAT HAVE CAME MY WAY
I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD SEE A HAPPY BEAUTIFUL DAY LIKE TODAY.

WHEN I'M WITH HIM I FEEL AT EASE
HE WILL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART, REGARDLESS IF I'M HERE OR OVERSEAS.

I'M GOING TO LET MY FEELINGS FLOW
THINGS MAY GO FAST OR SLOW.

SINCE I DON' T HAVE ANY PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS ABOUT HIM BEING THE WRONG MAN FOR ME
I'M GOING TO FOLLOW MY HEART AND LET THINGS BE.

MOTHER'S DAY!!!

I MUST SAY HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL YOU MOTHER'S. I'M NOT SO THRILLED ABOUT THE DAY. I WONDER IS IT BECAUSE I'M NOT A MOTHER? I DID NOTHING TODAY. I SLEPT THE DAY AWAY. I DID SOME EXERCISING TO RELAX MY MIND. THAT DID NOT WORK. I'LL BE GLAD WHEN TODAY IS OVER WITH.

I WON'T REALLY COMPLAIN BECAUSE I'M STILL LIVING AND HAVE MY HEALTH. NOW I MUST START GETTING READY FOR WORK TONIGHT. THE ONLY THING IS MY CAR IS ACTING UP. NOW I MUST TRY TO GET A RIDE FROM SOMEONE. I HATE ASKING OTHERS FOR STUFF. I KNOW THE SAYING EVERYONE NEEDS SOMEONE SOMETIME. I TRY NOT TO NEED ANY ONE. I DO MAKE MYSELF AVAILABLE TO OTHERS. I DO THAT BECAUSE, IF I TELL YOU I'M GOING TO DO SOMETHING FOR YOU I DO. I DON'T GO AND GOSSIP ABOUT IT TO OTHERS. I DON'T TRUST OTHERS TO NEED THEM. I'VE BEEN LET DOWN BY OTHERS THROUGHOUT MY LIFE. I'VE HAD OTHERS TELL PEOPLE WHAT THEY'VE DONE FOR ME. THE UNFORTUNATE THING IS THESE WERE FAMILY MEMBERS. SO I TRY NOT TO ACT LIKE THAT. I GIVE 100% OF ME TO FAMILY AND FRIENDS. I WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO. IT'S JUST THAT SOMETIMES IT GETS A LITTLE DISCOURAGING.

EVERYONE IN THE BLOG WORLD CONTINUE TO ENJOY YOUR HOLIDAY AND I'LL GET AT YOU LATER.

WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT....


I've really been keeping to myself. I stay busy with work and with my organization. We all know from previous blogs that I was having problems at home. Now I'm single and glad that I finally made up my mind to walk. I stayed in a relationship for six years out of pity and feeling obligated . We both did. It was unfair to us both because neither were happy. I'll always love her, but I love myself more. It had been a long time coming. I didn't plan it, like what day or time. It just came out and for once I'm relieved. It kind of took me by surprise.

Normally one says to give yourself some me time before you jump back into dating. To be honest I've had that me time for about four years. My mind is so much clearer. Almost as though I can breath again. There is some one that I am really digging. It's weird how we met and how so many people didn't want us to converse. Once again I go against the norm. My intuition is working in overtime. So far so good as usual dead on the money. I can't remember feeling this happy in a long time. It's as though we've known each other for years. I'll go even as far as some friend shit. We talk to each other about anything. We complete each others thoughts. That's some freaky stuff. I'm finally being accepted for me. There is no need to wear a mask. I really never did. Now at this moment I feel comfortable with being free to be me. There is a whole lot more I can say but at this time silence will suffice....

SCARY ASS PUNK

I NEVER THOUGHT THERE WOULD BE A DAY I WOULD CALL MYSELF A SCARY ASS PUNK. I'VE BEEN CONTEMPLATING THIS FOR A WHILE NOW. THERE WAS NEVER A MOMENT WHEN I WAS YOUNGER WHEN I WOULDN'T SAY OR DO ANYTHING. I GUESS I WAS MORE SECURE BACK THEN. I KNOW IT CAN'T BE OLD AGE.

THERE WAS THIS FEMALE THAT I'M FRIENDS WITH. I WAS SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO HER. I NEVER ACTED UPON IT OR EVEN MADE A PASS. I FIGURED EVENTUALLY IT WOULD HAPPEN. NEXT THING I KNOW SHE WAS MOVING AWAY. I HAD A LOT GOING ON AT THAT TIME AND SO DID SHE. ONE NIGHT SHE PUT IT OUT THERE AND INVITED ME TO GO OUT WITH HER BEFORE SHE LEFT FOR HER NEW JOURNEY. I RECLINED WORRIED ABOUT WORK. I KNEW DEEP DOWN THAT I WANTED IT AND THAT WOULD PROBABLY BE MY LAST CHANCE. IT WAS MY LAST CHANCE AND I DIDN'T DO A DAMN THING. IT WASN'T LIKE SHE WASN'T ATTRACTIVE. SHE WAS FINE AS HELL. BANGING ASS BODY, BEAUTIFUL FACE, AND VERY TALENTED AND BEAUTIFUL. I GUESS I SLIPPED AND MISSED MY BEAT. I WONDER WILL WE EVER GET THE CHANCE TO MAKE ILL BEATS THAT'LL FORM INTO THE PERFECT VERSES OF HIP-HOP?