SOULMATE


I never thought I would click with someone especially a man the way I did with"DTS". Men that I've told about my sexuality have pretended to understand and got these weird fantasies. When it really came down to it the jealously always reared it's ugly head. He was the only person that made me feel good about being me. He had no hang ups about my sexuality or my appearance. A good ol southern boy he was. See this brother was well diverse. He was one of those "OMEGA" brothers' that has been around the world quite a few times. He was a charming mofo. The most amazing thing was that I came at him. That is so not the norm for me. I don't like rejection so I don't do the approaching thing. But I knew I had to get to know this brother. That's exactly what I did. No one has ever known me like he does and I totally know him. I know things about him that his wife doesn't even know. Now he's separated from his wife. We're in different states and doing our own thing like we were before we ever met. I loved this brother and deep down probably still do. He has moved own with his life living alone and exclusively dating this female. I want to visit him so badly. But I feel as though things are so different between us....

We vowed not to ever let distance come between us or anything else. But something has come between us. I shouldn't even be thinking about him because i'm back with my girl. But I constantly feel something is missing and it's him. I miss him so much that I'm trying to hold back the tears from not seeing him, in a year and a half has built up inside of me. I use to lay in his arms at night and take in his breaths and become as one with him. He was the love of my life. I don't think I will ever vibe with any one the way I have with him. I know what ever is meant will be. Maybe I'll see him next lifetime. He's been on my mind a lot lately and I hadn't heard from him in a while. He texted me on Valentine's day. So I called him right back and told him if he could've texted me he could've called me. So I've tried to stay in touch over the past two weeks. I spoke with him yesterday. We've always been honest with one another and I immediately grew sad when I learned that he has moved on with this female, whom I thought was just a fling. I hoped when we were together he would leave all thebitterness of a relationship he had with his wife. Now he has since I've been back in the Chi. I felt like one day whenever he left his wife we would be together. He never sold that dream to me. I sold it to myself. We did say no matter what we would always remain as friends. I do miss his friendship. When I get over myself maybe I could try to restore what was lost as as great friend.


My heart has a special place for you.
The door has been open, all you have to do is walk through.
Everyday your face was my sunshine
Remembering your kisses and touches so sweet and kind.
You feel so close that I can taste it.
But you are really far, no where near not even a little bit.
Sleeping at night feeling your embrace
Kissing your body leaving a slight wet trace.
Darling please keep haunting my dreams
Everything will become true by all means.